Rated "R" -- actually I think its "X"

I had some more super strange dreams.  I took a three hour nap this afternoon and had 2 really vivid dreams. In the first one I was dating the prince of Persia who had a mean cat and looked just like Nolan. While we were out in this tiny car we went to the store. I really wanted some squeeze iceing but we couldn't find any. On our way back to his house we discovered that the road had a big sink hole in the middle and a backhoe was down in it trying to fix it. But "the Prince" decided that he would just RAMP those machines and get to the other side. We went airborne and then realized that the road in front of us was covered in 3 feet of water. We landed and laughed hysterically because we were so cool. HA! And my mom came to meet him after a day at the petting zoo with his mother but she pulled a muscle in her ribs trying to catch a rabbit. lololol
 In the other dream I was riding a standing lawn mower around downtown muncie. I had Vera with me and  was HUGLY pregnant. lol But the lawn mower was going faster than normal. Eventually a homeless man flagged us down and told us that my lawn mower wasn't street legal but that he would take it to the BMV to get the license plate. I agreed and pushed a button on the mower. A skateboard popped out and we got on. So I skateboard around downtown Muncie holding Vera.  I was VERY good at it (I've never in real life even stepped on a skateboard) and kept making these amazing jumps so that Vera could see cool things going on through building windows (once we saw a man blowing glass in front of a blazing furnace). I kept using Vera as a counter balance! hahaha! Eventually we went into a museum that had a dance club attached to it. The new attraction at the museum was about 10 of these tall figures. They looked like the scary, white mummy in Pan's Labyrinth except they had varied colorful stripes on them and were bent at the waist in strange directions. Oh, and -I wish I could whisper this- they all had two colorful, bandaged-wrapped penises. ??????  Also they didn't feel scary, actually they made me in a good mood. Next we skateboarded down  to the dance-club/bar where the bar tender was really cranky. I told her the bathroom was flooded and she went to find someone to take care of it. While she was gone I stole like 30 peppermint patties from behind the bar. They were special peppermint patties, she was selling them for $4 a piece. The cookie part was white and translucent and the green mint filling glowed. And I also stole some of those vanilla and strawberry wafer cookies. And so huge belly and all I skateboarded out of that museum with an armful of loot. Then I woke up. I CANNOT BELIEVE these weird dreams.